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I've done the unthinkable.

Oh, and I've also posted the last bit of Heat Tolerance on the Teaspoon. Here's a short teaser while you wait for it to clear the mods...

“No no no,” the Doctor denied, rubbing his face with his palms and then sliding his hands up into his hair, mussing it in a familiar gesture of irritation. “Are you even listening to me? I can’t.”

“Can’t, or won’t?” Jack pressed. “What are you so afraid of?”

The Doctor’s only response was an inarticulate noise, full of frustration and a hint of disgust. He pushed off from the sofa, standing in preparation to beat a hasty retreat from Jack and his difficult questions.

But Jack had decided that enough was enough. His hand darted forward, catching the Doctor’s sleeve and tugging him backwards.


But... back to the important thing. I've done the unthinkable.

I've written porn.

Not sweet/hot/cute/crack/OT3 porn, which I would not be nearly as much embarassed about.

I know it's not everyone's cup of tea, but I spend way too much time on dw_slash and the things that happen there regularly eat my brain. This time I was weak and I gave in and started typing.

That's right.

I wrote snowgrouse-manip-inspired Master/Doctor Life-on-Mars-ogodpoorsam-crossover noncon-bondage-mindfuck porn. I've never even seen Life on Mars.

And that's not the embarassing part.

It's not even good porn. I know it's bad, because I let it sit for a couple of days and read it again. It's... bad.

And now I'm thinking about trying to fix what even I could tell was bad about it. And then letting it sit for a few more days to see if it's still bad. Rinsing and repeating until it no longer makes me cringe. And then pleading the other denizens of dw_slash for a porn beta willing to be ruthless. And then fixing it some more. And then actually posting it.

Because, oh Rassilon's Rubbers (take that to mean what you will, but at least it's alliterative), it's bad. And it offends my sensibilities, and I want it to stop being bad so I won't feel like I'm a cheap, bad porn writer.

So... yeah.

::wanders off, muttering:: 


Jan. 22nd, 2008 08:48 am (UTC)
Read Heat Tolerance over on Teaspoon. Loved it. Jack makes the sweetest mattress ever.

And I haven't watched Life on Mars either, but I saw that manip, and the more porn (bad or otherwise, as long as I get to read it) that it inspires the better.
Jan. 22nd, 2008 08:06 pm (UTC)
I kinda wish I had my own Jack-mattress, actually. :-)

The porn actually came from your comment, I think. ::scratches head:: Does that make this all your fault? :-P
Jan. 23rd, 2008 08:48 am (UTC)
Well, at least partly my fault. Eep. *blushes* I very much want to see what you've some up with :-P
*grins* Personally, I blame snowgrouse - I have porn in my brain with holes in it, and K9 in the holes (but not, thankfully, in the porn) saying "Insufficient data, Mistress. Suggest watching Life on Mars at the earliest opportunity."
Jan. 24th, 2008 07:18 am (UTC)
I'm just such a porn-virgin. I've never been able to write porn that wasn't also crack. But the combination of that manip and what you said in that comment... I don't know why that ate my brain. Call it temporary insanity.

You'll get to see the result eventually... with full credit/blame to you and snowgrouse... sooner if you're willing to beta it, that is help tear it apart and rebuild it so it stops being completely embarrassing crap. :-)
Jan. 24th, 2008 11:48 am (UTC)
Only temporary? *grins*

I'd certainly be willing, if you'd like me to - although I've never actually betaed (beta-read?) anything before, so you'd have to give me a few pointers on how to go about it. On the plus side, I've just watched the first episode of Life on Mars, so I have some idea of who Sam is, now.
Jan. 24th, 2008 07:55 pm (UTC)
Basically, I need folks who are comfortable writing porn to tell me where I'm getting it all wrong!

Since I like your porn-brain, and you now officially know more about Life on Mars than I do, you'd make a wonderful beta. :-)

My address is adaliazandra at yahoo dot com. Could you drop me a line there, or let me know in a comment reply to which address I should send the aforementioned bad porn? It might be a bit before I'm even ready to send it to beta, but I'll get there eventually.
Jan. 24th, 2008 08:44 pm (UTC)
*grins* In that case, send bad porn to temperantia178@yahoo.com.au


Adalia Zandra


This is adaliazandra's fic journal, which she hadn't planned to use very often. That plan has since been defenestrated in favor of posting fic update notices and rambles about DW and TW.

If you note the spiffy paid-account layout, that's because nightrider101 is simply the most wonderful person ever! :-)

If I seem to have disappeared off the face of the Internet, it's because I probably did. I don't actually *like* suddenly ignoring my LJ friends and leaving my stories hanging, though, so odds are I'll be back eventually.