(The following is only slightly dramatized...)
Me: "Hey, how is everyone doing?"
Dad: "We're good. Lost power for a while, but it's back now. A couple of trees came down. They didn't hit anything except the phone lines at the bottom of the backyard. We'll have to call somebody about that later. We still don't have cell service or cable but our DVD collection is keeping us entertained. Your siblings are both still alive. Oh, by the way, we lost half the roof."
Me: "I'm glad you guys are--wait, no, seriously, did you just say you lost the roof?"
Dad: "Half the roof."
Me: "Half the roof came off!? And you didn't think to mention that first!?"
Dad: "You didn't ask me which half."
Me: "Sigh. Yes, Dad. Which half?"
Dad: "The top half! There are shingles all over the place."
Me: "Great. So the house is still okay?"
Dad: "Yup. Just missing a bunch of fifteen-year-old shingles. Like I said, half the roof."
Me: "I love you, Dad."
He keeps proudly telling that to everyone who will listen. Mom says he'll stop doing it when he hears how much it'll cost to fix. But, all in all, my family and friends are safe. Some are still without power and most don't have cell service, but they're all safe. (Well, except possibly my Dad. I could strangle him.)