?

Log in

No account? Create an account

previous entry | next entry

FIC: Triangles, Timestamped

At wendymr's request, Triangles has been extended with a timestamp at plus one week.

I didn't do it on purpose, but it came out as a foursome of roughly triangular shaped half-drabbles. :-)



It’s been a week.
 
And yet still the TARDIS sits there.
 
He’s been rested and relatively healthy for several days now.
 
And yet still they watch him, his two humans, all concerned looks and worried glances.
 
He knows why. Sometimes, he’s a little bit worried, too.
 
Rhomboids, whispers his mind.
 
 
They watch him.
 
He drifts to a halt mid step, or mid word.
 
He looks confused and lost, perhaps even frightened.
 
And then his eyes find them… rhomboids, triangle, us… and he sighs shakily.
 
They lead him to bed. He lets himself be held between them.
 
He feels safer there.
 
 
Slowly, it fades.
 
The feelings of barely restrained panic.
 
The moments of not knowing where or when he is.
 
The memories of wondering if he’d ever return alive, ever see them again.
 
He leads them to bed, and fits himself snugly between them.
 
Finally able to admit he needs them.
 
 
It’s time to go.
 
The planet is safe, there’s no more reason to stay.
 
The TARDIS can hover in the Vortex, instead, waiting patiently.
 
So they find themselves in bed again, now out of habit, each content to cuddle the others.
 
The rhomboids are finally, truly gone.

The triangle remains.

Comments

( 11 comments — leave a comment )
dark_aegis
Apr. 12th, 2008 02:28 am (UTC)
Oh, I love this. The style you chose to use fits so very well. I can really see the progression here of the Doctor's recovery. And the ending was so very them. Gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous. And I do love me some hurt/comfort. :)
adaliafic
Apr. 12th, 2008 02:38 am (UTC)
I'm really glad you like the style... I was a little bit worried about it being too artsy.

I'm also glad the idea of a progression came through! That was probably the single thing I tried to focus on the most.

Thanks so much for commenting! :-)
wendymr
Apr. 12th, 2008 02:30 am (UTC)
Oh, gorgeous. The structure of this is brilliant. It's sparse yet rich, and emotion flows through the very short sentences and half-drabble pieces. Just beautiful.

And this:
yet still they watch him, his two humans, all concerned looks and worried glances.

He knows why. Sometimes, he’s a little bit worried, too.

Rhomboids, whispers his mind.


Love the reference back to the way the Doctor anchored himself in Triangles, and the clear sense of concern and caring from Jack and Rose that comes across here. Perfect!

And in my head, of course, they do a lot more than just cuddle when they're in bed together ;)
adaliafic
Apr. 12th, 2008 03:00 am (UTC)
I really am glad the structure works! I was a bit nervous about it.

It was good practice in forcing myself to use short sentences, certainly something I don't do very often. :-)

Glad you liked it so much! I never specified what else they did in bed... ::grin::

Thanks for commenting! :-)
dameruth
Apr. 12th, 2008 02:52 am (UTC)
Oooo. I like. Great use of the triangle motif. Doesn't come off as too "artsy" at all.

And yay for the Doc initiating snuggle time! :D
adaliafic
Apr. 12th, 2008 03:46 am (UTC)
I'm glad you think the triangles worked. I was really hoping they wouldn't just wind up looking silly!

Honestly, I'd always wanted to see Nine initiating snuggle time in this story, but it wouldn't have fit in the original fic. :-)

Thank you for commenting!

Edited at 2008-04-12 05:31 am (UTC)
nightrider101
Apr. 12th, 2008 03:09 pm (UTC)
This was lovely! Triangles remains one of my absolute favorite Nine fics. It's hard to write a believable scene were he'll allow himself physical comfort. You wrote it so well.

The rhomboids are finally, truly gone.

The triangle remains.


Beautiful. :) I agree with what everyone said above. It definitely doesn't come off as to 'artsy'. It's more like a flow of random thoughts. It worked well!
adaliafic
Apr. 16th, 2008 05:41 am (UTC)
That's actually the entire reason why I wrote Triangles! It's so hard to get Nine to accept physical comfort. I decided to just exhaust him beyond all reason and hand him over to Rose and Jack. I'm glad you like the results. :-)

As always, thanks for commenting!
_sapphiredreams
Sep. 1st, 2008 07:04 am (UTC)
I love the Triangle story. It's so hard to find sick!doctor or exhausted!doctor stories. This was a great find and I loved the descriptions.
adaliafic
Nov. 7th, 2008 09:25 pm (UTC)
I'm glad you enjoyed this story so much! I, too, love sick!exhausted!Doctor stories. There just aren't enough out there, so I stared writing them. :-)

Thank you for reading and commenting!
tempusdominus10
Jul. 14th, 2011 08:33 am (UTC)
Eally? You od a lot of those? I am really into Eleven now, adn write a lot of Doctor! Whump or Doctor! Pregnant stories, all mostly family friendly... I was wondering... IS there a list of all your whumped! Doctor stories? Sick or exhausted or injured, or all three? It's an art, and you certainly have it down. -plops an altar to you down in the apple grass-. Now if i can just manage to get my LJ MAsterlisted and more stories on sometime before we all evolve into the Futurekind... Your style with this really reminds me of one of my styles sometimes, when I 'm feelin a bit poetic. This really rocks nad I love it. WOOOT!
( 11 comments — leave a comment )

Profile

adaliafic
Adalia Zandra

greetings

This is adaliazandra's fic journal, which she hadn't planned to use very often. That plan has since been defenestrated in favor of posting fic update notices and rambles about DW and TW.

If you note the spiffy paid-account layout, that's because nightrider101 is simply the most wonderful person ever! :-)

If I seem to have disappeared off the face of the Internet, it's because I probably did. I don't actually *like* suddenly ignoring my LJ friends and leaving my stories hanging, though, so odds are I'll be back eventually.